The air in between
On exploring the liminal spaces between moments
It’s a quiet Saturday afternoon. One of those days where the air is filled with restlessness. When you’re tossing between an endless list of things you could be doing; revisiting old plant friends on my local walk, letting my mind sing on pages of blank paper, reading a book that pours wisdom into my ears, conversing with friends over warming food or more practically, cleaning my abode, picking up some groceries, doing my laundry etc, etc... This particular Saturday, I sat at my desk going through this list, trying to tune in to what I wanted to do (something that doesn’t come easily to me). Nothing stuck out. Forceful energy masked itself as learning to be more decisive.
However the restless nature that evaded me was less about practicing decision making and more about discerning where my mind was at. My mind was caught in the unusual future perspective of recounting my day. As in, when my day is over, when a friend, family, someone or even no one, asks me how it was, what is my answer? Or, in other words, what have I done or achieved that is worthy of mention?
Productivity often pervades the present, casting your vision elsewhere.
This perspective is something I unconsciously engage in quite often. So as I sat at my desk, I started to question it which lead me down a series of thoughts about the liminal spaces we often exist in.
Between moments of doing, there’s a state of being. A state where you’re simply breathing. In the same way that we often breathe unconsciously, I feel that our mind too doesn’t give much notice to the air in between.
In conversations when we’re asked ‘how has your day been?’, we (well at least I) tend to list a series of moments. Moments, in this instance refers to a very brief period of time, often a milestone event or landmark experience that we can easily recount. We’re habituated to take notice of these, keep an audit, a memory box, a highlights reel. But what is to be said for the vast expanses of time between these moments? The air in between.
I see it in two ways.
One, the moments are the scattered dots on a page. The air in between is the line connecting those dots. It takes you on a journey and helps you draw the bigger picture, making sense of the sporadic nature of this existence.
Two, the moments are the mountain peaks and troughs. The air in between is the rugged terrain you’re climbing, the long grass fields you swim through, the smooth slopes you slide down, the big boulders you hop over. In this way, the moments can be seen as the pause at the summit or valley, where you get to see where you are. A chance to take in the view. Yet, to make it to the next peak, or to know how to navigate the next trough, we need not to look back at the previous moments of pause but instead the journey we took between.
I’m finding myself offering more and more attention to these spaces of being. Why?
To learn
to connect
and to be.
I find that these spaces of existence carry so much wisdom and juicy insight into us as a being. And it’s not always a silent existence. It can be pure chaotic energy, an outpouring of emotions, it can be calmness, inquisitive curiosity or exuberant joy. It can be anything. For me, I started off seeing the air in between as simply the state when an idea enters my field, simmering in my mind yet to eventuate into anything tangible. However in giving more attention to this, I have taken notice of several other instances where I exist in this space.
A list of some that have come up for me:
The state of processing; when you’re mulling over a moment from the past, present or future, positive or negative. When you’re experiencing it through your body, physically and emotionally and you’re trying to make sense of it in your mind.
The bliss state of gratitude experienced when you’re simply observing; when you are full to the brim with so much high vibrational energy that you emanate it through your whole being.
The visceral experience of emotions after a conflict; the outpouring of loss, grief, anger, sadness, fear etc. And the emotions that come up even when time has passed; the subtle reminders that cue a full body sensation.
The quiet lull of mundanity or a state of pure stillness.
The space of disorientation; when you feel lost, aren’t grounded in your being and are caught in the endless thoughts that enter your realm.
The period of rest; when your body seeks stillness, restoration and healing with no questions of what is to come.
There’s many I’ve missed but this list gives light to the spectrum of experiences that can exist here. Noticing these spaces lets you become familiar with your self on many levels. It lets you slow down from the mindless pursuit of moments. From stretching yourself thin across different planes. From escaping and intoxicating yourself with distractions. It gives you wisdom for the future and helps you move a step closer, towards a more empowered self.
In saying all of the above, I am finding, that the more I speak to these states of being, the more I share with friends and people alike, the more I connect on a deeper, enriching level. It can feel quite odd at times. A stream of consciousness conversation that is not so destination led. Probably sounds like what you do in therapy. But why can’t we invite that level of intimacy in our day-to-day?
This Saturday afternoon train of thought was born in the air in between. It shifted the course of the rest of that day with questions and newfound insights that have rippled outwards since. Inviting more of this is a personal aspiration of mine cause this is where I believe the magic happens. Chaos or bliss, the air in between is where things alchemise within.
Much love
Rekha ரேகா xx